An old joke has a person on their knees, fervently praying, “God, grant me patience . . . now!”
Patience is a virtue that ebbs and flows with many of us. There are times we can sit patiently awaiting an event or something, and there are other times we just want to get on with it. Or we want to get there. It’s not rare to hear someone say, “I need that done yesterday.”
But patience is an important attribute in the Bible. The Bible speaks of God’s patience, and there are frequent encouragements for His people to be patient. Patience is the first word used to define love in 1 Corinthians 13: “Love is patient.”
So what is patience, and why is it so important that we make it a part of our character?
Patience Defined
The Oxford Living Dictionary defines patience as “the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, problems or suffering without becoming annoyed or anxious.”
There are those who confuse patience with acquiescence. Again, referring to the Oxford, acquiescence is “the reluctant acceptance of something without protest.” Followers of Christ can equate acquiescence with patience, since we are called to turn the other cheek and to submit to one another. Too often, we equate standing firm in the faith as rocking the boat, so we resign ourselves to the end result without asserting our faith or our strength. This is not patience. This is not a virtue.
The Bible clearly sees patience as a virtue, one that comes from strength and assurance. Just reading passages from Proverbs, we see the virtues of being patient. In the Proverbs, our patience is seen as the result of wisdom (19:11) and a source of great understanding (14:29). The writer of Proverbs tells us that “Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone” (Proverbs 25:15). Ecclesiastes 7:8 states, “The end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride.”
In the New Testament, patience is closely related to the strength that comes through the power of the Holy Spirit: “being strengthened with all power according to His glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience” (Colossians 1:11). Paul includes patience as an element included in his list of the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22-23.
James refers the readers of his letter to Job as an example of patience. Job endured unimaginable hardship while being tested, and his patience was rewarded. I would add Joseph as another example of patience. Here was a man who endured being sold into slavery by his brothers, wrongly accused of attempted rape, imprisoned and forgotten, only to be finally rewarded with power second only to Pharaoh. In all the circumstances of his life, he never lost sight of God working in and through him to bring about God’s will.
In short, for the believer, patience is a strength that grows out of our relationship with God. Through the fruit of the Holy Spirit, we are able to wait and tolerate events, knowing and trusting that God’s will shall prevail as we await the outcome. To await the outcome does not mean sitting idly by while awaiting events to unfold, but taking steps in obedience to God’s leadership, knowing His timing is best.
Patience as an Express of Love
The list of things used to explain love in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a is very much relational in its uses. The list starts with patience, and it is grouped with kindness. The patience is what we extend to each person we encounter each day. As the love of Christ infuses us and transforms us, we begin to see people as He does. We are able to overlook the annoying things a person or people do (and people are very annoying at times), to see them more as Christ did—worthy of His love and sacrifice.
2Patience is demonstrated in the way we put up with people. This isn’t always easy. One of my pet peeves is the tendency some people have to repeat themselves over and over again. If someone tells me something, I’m usually aware enough to get the message the first time I hear it. I don’t need to hear it three or four more times. If a person tells me something, and I say I understand and I will take a step to make the event happen or correct a mistake, I don’t need for the person to belabor the issue (sort of like I’m doing now).
The patient person, though, realizes that a lot of times, people are not confident in their communication skills, so they feel the need to repeat themselves more than once. The person is not convinced he or she has properly conveyed the message, so they repeat it, sometimes with slightly different words or terms. Learning to be patient means I need to listen to them, thank them, repeat to them what I have heard them say, let them know what I will do, and hope they will be satisfied that the conversation is ended, or at least that the topic has been adequately conveyed and we can move on to other things.
Patience is also expressed in letting people do things their way. See if this sounds familiar: “I’m the only decent driver on the road.” “I’m the only one who really knows how to load the dishwasher.” “When are people going to learn there’s a right way to fold the laundry?” if one or more of these statements applies to you, then the attribute of patience needs to be cultivated. The patient person will let others do things the way they want to do them, within reason. (After all, do we really want the car next to us on the interstate to continue into our lane when the end result will be a collision? That’s what a polite but firm honk of the horn is for.)
Patience is a virtue that, like most virtues, takes time to cultivate. It requires an awareness of one’s own shortcomings, and it requires quite a bit of the Golden Rule. If I want people to cut me some slack, I need to cut others the same slack. If I want others to respect me, then I need to demonstrate respect towards others. The Golden Rule is an excellent way to develop patience, if for no other reason than the Rule requires us to act in a way that has no bearing on how people treat us.
Conclusion
The patience Paul writes of in 1 Corinthians 13 is one that does not necessary expect an immediate result in all things. Rather, it is willing to bide the time needed to let the end result come to be, having faith that God’s will will prevail in the matter.
Patience is waiting for God’s actions to come to fruition in His time. It recognizes that God is acting each moment toward the goal, and believing that His timing is perfect. Once we place things in His hands, we discover our patience with circumstances and with people increases and we are more where He wants us to be as a result.
© 2019 Glynn Beaty